Tuesday

Nearly two years after the last post and finally the covetable Buzzfeed mention! Alexander Hamilton can rest soundly in his phallic-shaped tomb tonight...

So for this better-late-than-never boner I thought I'd take some inspiration from another Buzzfeed post, aptly named "FDR's Son Was a Hottie." And fret not: you can expect the combination of the same lame graphics and jokes with some hot-ass bros coming your way again on a (hopefully) regular basis. The BDiH res-ERECTION is upon us!

HISTORIC BONER NO. 23 Franklin Delano Roosevelt, Jr., American lawyer and politician (and son of FDR)

The Evidence:

Because I'm totally obsessed with Trading Places and the injustice that was committed when I was not christened "Blanche" or "Muffy" (OBVIOUSLY), let us pause for a second and focus on the concept of a "social register." According to Wiki, my trusted friend, the first American manifestation of this directory of the social elite appeared in Cleveland (of all places) and was advertised as a "Ladies Visiting List and Shopping Guide." A shopping guide for eligible young bachelors, perhaps? Funny also that the term "blue book" applies to both these registers and to the reference book for car prices... Anyway, the Roosevelts have a history of being omitted from the New York Social Register--the preeminent social directory in the 20th century--as FDR, Jr.'s older brother, Elliot, was given the boot in 1935 for some salacious (or not) reason or other. Acts of social suicide that "warranted" omission from the Register's volumes included divorce, taking a spouse from "outside the circle," and pursuing a career in the theatre. Double hex then on Charles Black (whose father was the president of Pacific Gas and Electric Company) for marrying Shirley Temple, a divorcée and (duh) former child star.

And once more, for emphasis. You're welcome.

Next Time: Send me your suggestions!